Trey Parker Wants a F**king Oscar, Lea Michele Shortlisted for Les Miz Movie and Other Lessons of the Week

As another busy week on the Great White Way comes to a close, Broadway.com is ready to revisit the top stories of the last seven days. Between sexy striptease stage antics, big-screen movie musical drama and the Broadway dreams of fabulous figure skaters, it's a lot! Need a reminder of what's been going on online lately? Read on for our recap of the top 10 lessons from the week!

Trey Parker Wants an Oscar Really F**ing Bad
The Book of Mormon co-composer and co-director Trey Parker scored a Grammy nomination this week for the show’s cast recording and should he win, the South Park co-creator will be one step closer to becoming an EGOT winner. “I need to get my f**king Oscar that I lost to Phil Collins,” Parker told Broadway.com. With a Book of Mormon movie on the horizon, that may not be impossible after all. Here’s hoping Parker gets to deliver an acceptance speech at the Kodak Theatre someday soon!

Lysistrata Jones Basketball Stud Josh Segarra Isn’t a Pro Stripper...Yet
Lysistrata Jones' handsome leading man Josh Segarra may play overconfident athlete Mick, but that doesn’t mean the actor is full of himself. Segarra dreads having to perform his striptease scene each night, which results in him standing on stage in his undies. “It’s terrifying,” Segarra said of dropping trou. “It never gets easy. I don’t want anyone to think, ‘Oh, he was much cuter with his shirt on!’” No complaints here, Josh. Feel free to take your shirt off any time.

The Bonnie & Clyde Cast Communicates Backstage Via Walkie-Talkie
Bonnie & Clyde is set back in 1934, but the cast is using up-to-date technology to communicate backstage. In a visit to Claybourne Elder’s dressing room, the actor showed off the walkie-talkie set leading lady Laura Osnes bought for her co-stars to help keep in touch at the Schoenfeld Theatre. It’s too bad the real Bonnie and Clyde didn’t have any walkie-talkies…their fate might have turned out a little different. Over and out!

Johnny Weir Wants to Hop On Board Priscilla
Despite his flair for the theatrical, flamboyant figure skater Johnny Weir had to admit that he could use a crash course in theater when asked about potential Broadway ambitions. “I’m not a good gay,” he said. “I’m not up on the Broadway news.” Well-versed or not, Weir has his eyes on a certain prize when it comes to dreaming of his own Broadway debut. “Priscilla. I mean, hello!” If Johnny doesn’t come to Broadway, maybe Broadway will come to Johnny. Priscilla on Ice, anyone?

Theater Is (Almost) As Good As Sex!
It’s official! Theater lovers everywhere were delighted to find out that theatergoing ranked third, behind sex and exercise, on the list of activities that make people happy, in a study conducted by the London School of Economics. If anyone needs an excuse to get to a theater, now it’s part of an official recipe for the perfect day: hit the gym, see a Broadway show and…you get the idea.

Spider-Man is Still Flying High After its First Year on Broadway
Time flies! It’s already been a year since Spider-Man, Turn Off the Dark played its first infamous preview, with gossip-mongers buzzing about the show's fate on the Great White Way. In true superhero fashion, Spidey proved he could “rise above” any obstacle. During the week of the musical’s first Broadway anniversary, the production pulled in a whopping $2 million in ticket sales. That's a lot of heads for Spider-Man to soar over!

Laura Osnes is Obsessed With Planking
Laura Osnes and Jeremy Jordan are bringing down the house as the title outlaws of Bonnie & Clyde, but the show’s real scene-stealer is the actress’ abs. Osnes shared the secret of her six-pack with Broadway.com. Planking. No, not the random fad activity, the move where you brace yourself on your feet and elbows, engage your core and hold. She’s been doing it for one minute every day for a year and a half, and let’s just say the results speak for themselves. You could grate cheese on those things.

Godspell’s Anna Maria Perez de Tagle Gives the Coolest Gifts Ever
In the final installment of his backstage video blog, Godspell’s Telly Leung offers up advice to aspiring Broadway performers and jokingly notes that they should try to score a gig with his co-star, Anna Maria Perez de Tagle. The reason? She gives awesome presents! Leung showed off the adorable, giant heart-shaped pillow embroidered with his face that Perez de Tagle gave as an opening night gift. Jesus' birthday is coming up...hopefully she has some good Christmas presents ready!

Burning Rehearsal Was Like an Eyes Wide Shut Sex Party
When a show has as much nudity and simulated sex on stage as off-Broadway’s Burning, it’s hard not to wonder what that rehearsal room looked like. Luckily, star Hunter Foster helped satisfy that curiosity. “On the first day of rehearsal, there was definitely a tension in the room,” Foster recently told Broadway.com. “Almost like I was Tom Cruise showing up at that crazy sex party in Eyes Wide Shut.” Hey Hunter, were there masks involved there, too?

Lea Michele Isn’t a Shoo-In for Les Miz Film
Even though Glee fave Lea Michele reportedly gave one hell of an audition to play Eponine in the star-studded Les Miserables film, the actress is apparently in for some stiff competition from some fellow A-listers. Tony winner Scarlett Johansson has her eye on the part, as do indie actress Evan Rachel Wood and pop country queen Taylor Swift. Well, yeah, who doesn’t want to be in love with Eddie Redmayne? Luckily, Rachel Berry isn’t afraid of a little competition.