Orlando Bloom Is Revving Up for Romeo, Kristin Chenoweth Has No Patience and More Lessons of the Week

There are still a few more weeks of summer left, and that means there’s still some time to fill your August with knowledge learned from all the crazy news on Broadway this week. From Sophia Grace Brownlee’s gig in the Woods to Idina Menzel’s impromptu airport jam sesh, here are the top 10 things we learned this week.

Homemade YouTube Videos Can Send You Into the Woods
Hello, little girl, indeed! Ten-year-old mini-celeb Sophia Grace Brownlee has landed the role of Little Red in the upcoming Into the Woods movie, and we’re baffled. Not necessarily by the casting of the little scene-stealer, but did we miss the memo that says you can post a homemade rap video on YouTube and get a role in a Sondheim musical with Meryl Streep and Johnny Depp two years later? Who knew!? Well, at least we know things now.

Lindsay Mendez Gets a Daily Monkey Massage
One of the perks of playing Elphaba on Broadway? Getting your own backstage massage from one of the many flying monkeys in Wicked! Or at least that’s what we learned from Lindsay Mendez in the latest episode of her video blog, Fly Girl, in which Mendez confessed that one of the show’s more generous ensemble members gives her some grade-A simian shiatsu. We imagine that a personal masseur is just one of many reasons to say “Thank Goodness.”

Matthew James Thomas Has a Superhero Secret
Pippin star Matthew James Thomas didn’t get to keep his superhero suit from his time in the high-flying Spider-Man, Turn Off the Dark, but he insisted that even if he did, he would only have one use for it: “I would dress up as Spider-Man at two in the morning and run around and convince people I was Spider-Man!” We’d be on board with that far-out fantasy, MJT. If we ever find ourselves in a dark alley after closing time, we will be on the lookout for a golden-haired webslinger with a hot girlfriend.  

Kristin Chenoweth Doesn’t Wait for Dream Roles
Despite promising that it would be “about 10 years” before she tackled her dream role of playing meddling matchmaker Dolly Levi on stage, Kristin Chenoweth is now rumored to be taking Hello, Dolly! back to Broadway—much sooner than we thought! Maybe this Tony winner is inclined to conquer all her dream roles even though she’s far too young. What’s next, KC? A little Madame Armfeldt in 2016?

Romeo Rides a Hog
Who knew Orlando Bloom was so badass? We were just as surprised as you were to learn that in the upcoming contemporary staging of Romeo and Juliet, the titular pair will be revving up the romance onstage courtesy of Romeo’s hot new motorcycle. Bloom and Condola Rashad are going to serve up some major Hell’s Angel/biker babe passion when they speed onto the stage this August. Just think less star-crossed, more motocrossed.

The First Date Cast Is Totally Flirting With You
It shouldn’t be much of a surprise, but it turns out that the seven-person cast of the new Broadway musical First Date is as lusty as the show itself. When we asked each actor to pinpoint the biggest flirt in the cast, pretty much every person’s name came up! So now we know: If you ever find yourself backstage at First Date, be prepared for more mixed signals than a jammed phone line.

Nolan Gerard Funk Wants to Get Dirrrty on Screen
Apparently, a steamy sex scene with Lindsay Lohan just isn’t enough for Broadway and Glee alum Nolan Gerard Funk. While chatting with us about his sex-soaked new flick The Canyons, Funk admitted that he expects “much more graphic scenes in my career, I’m sure.” You're welcome, Internet! The more times you get to see Funk get funky, the more animated GIFs to go around. Like this one. Which we're sure you haven’t watched 100 times. Right?

Laura Bell Bundy Has Anger Issues
You’ve got to hand it to Laura Bell Bundy. Not every actress would be willing to go up against Charlie Sheen, but this blonde bombshell is doing just that when she joins the cast of Sheen’s batsh*t-crazy FX sitcom Anger Management this fall. Seriously, consider us impressed. And consider Sheen impressed when Bundy inevitably busts out the “Bend and Snap” on set.

Don’t Get Stuck on a Layover with Idina and Taye
We love ourselves some Menzel-Diggs duet action, but not when we’re trying to nap in the Delta lounge. The married performers posted a video of themselves singing a beatbox version of “I’m Not That Girl” from Wicked, which was great and all, except for the fact that they were probably disturbing everyone else waiting to board. As far as travel companions go, there are the good ones, the bad ones, and the Wicked ones with iPhones and access to YouTube.

Julie White Wants to Knock Out Cherry Jones
Vanya and Sonia newcomer Julie White joked that her desire to do The Glass Menagerie with her Transformers co-star Shia LaBeouf was derailed by Cherry Jones and Zachary Quinto, who are already doing the classic on Broadway this fall. Watch out, Cherry—there’s about to be an Amanda Wingfield THROW DOWN! Don’t underestimate Julie White, because she’s one Tony winner that definitely isn’t afraid to kick some Glass.