Adam Chanler-Berat: A Broadway "Graduation" at Next to Normal

About the author:
The actors who play the fractured family in Next to Normal have gotten most of the glory, but Adam Chanler-Berat’s performance as Henry, the sweetest boyfriend on earth, is a crucial element in the musical’s success. Henry’s reactions to the dysfunction surrounding Natalie, the girl he adores, reflect the roller-coaster of emotions experienced by the audience. It’s a mature performance, which is doubly striking given the fact that Chanler-Berat is making his Broadway debut and dropped out of college to take the role in the original 2008 Second Stage production. We asked him to sum up what the Next to Normal journey has meant to him, and Chanler-Berat responded with an essay as appealing as the character he plays.

 

The first day of rehearsal for Next to Normal at Second Stage felt like a replay of my college orientation. I woke up that morning with the same “I’m gonna puke,” “don’t screw this up” pit in my stomach. When I got there, I met tons of people, didn’t remember anyone’s name, smiled a little too hard, talked a little too loud and a little too much, and then, in an attempt to rein in my nerves, got a little too quiet and introverted. One thing I was sure I was good at was humiliating myself in socially overwhelming situations.

I can only laugh about what a fool I must have seemed. I guess I should cut myself some slack. After all, I was leaving college early to work on a new six-person, chamber-rock musical at one of the best off-Broadway theater companies in town. Not to mention I’d be working with a Broadway composer (Tom Kitt), the smartest director on the Great White Way (Michael Greif, director of Rent and Grey Gardens, to name two) and the guy who puts “pro” in producer (David Stone).

Oh yeah. And the leading role in the show would be played by musical theater legend Alice Ripley. (As a coincidental side note, I sang “You Should Be Loved” from Side Show to get into Marymount Manhattan College…and now I’m singing “There Will Be Light” with her.) Thinking back on this, how did I not throw up that first day?

I guess the reason I was able to keep my banana and Cheerios from splatting onto the rehearsal room floor was I had no clue what I was getting myself into. I had no idea how long this journey would continue, how meaningful these people whose names I could barely remember would become, and how profoundly the next two years would impact my craft and my personal life.

I’m just now, after 20-some-odd preview performances and 80-some-odd regular performances in our new Broadway home, the Booth Theater, starting to realize just how much I’ve changed since that first rehearsal. All of these people—Michael, David, Brian [Yorkey, our book writer], Tom, Charlie [Alterman, our musical director], Jenn [Damiano, who plays my onstage girlfriend, Natalie] have poked, prodded, encouraged and tested me.

What’s the overarching lesson? What can I tell my parents to console them about my being 22 and college degree-less? As an actor, I’ve learned to be brave; to trust in myself, to believe in my instincts, and to listen to my heart just as much as my mind. As a person, I’ve learned to acknowledge all feelings as valid and worthy and to not strive for people’s approval.

A few weeks ago, I attended my classmates’ graduation from Marymount Manhattan. It was a bittersweet moment for me; the joy I had for my friends’ accomplishment stewing with the feeling that I’ve missed out on something momentous. But now I realize that Next to Normal’s Broadway opening was my college graduation. It was a frozen moment in time; a moment of reflecting on how far I’ve come from my past and looking to the future with fearlessness and fire. I wonder if this means I can expect huge congratulatory checks in the mail from my family!