Adam Pascal's Got a Hard Bard Gig, Ariana DeBose Will Sing You Silly & More Lessons of the Week

Happy Friday, and happy National Dessert Day! While you wait for your chocolate cake and blueberry bacon pie to come out of the oven, let's revisit the wackiest and wildest stories from this week on the Great White Way. A lot has happened over the past seven days, from the realization of our dream couples' costume for Halloween to a wee accident from an Oscar nominee in ancient Greece. Confused? Don't be. Study up below with the Lessons of the Week!


You Don't Have to Know the Bard to Be Him
Adam Pascal has a way with rock. Iambic pentameter? Not so much. The Rent Tony nominee is Something Rotten!'s latest Shakespeare, despite admitting to a total lack of knowledge of the Bard's oeuvre. He's still excited, though—especially for a particular costume piece: "The bigger the codpiece, the better." That seems like a great place to stuff your CliffsNotes, Adam.


Ariana DeBose Can Mash Gravity Swiftly
She’s a travel agent, a friend to her drummer (we think—we’re still figuring that one out), and now, Ariana DeBose is a defier of gravity. The A Bronx Tale vlogger gave us a taste of her and her co-stars’ vocal pyrotechnics with a mash-up of “Defying Gravity,” “I Knew You Were Trouble” and “My Boo.” Ariana and company: If you ever want to stop by and try out another mash-up, we have a piano. Just saying.


Medea Made Diane Lane Lose Control
Diane Lane is back on Broadway in The Cherry Orchard, and thankfully, she's not peeing herself on stage (we assume). The Oscar nominee bravely recalled her child acting days in Medea (in Ancient Greek!) when she couldn't hold it in any longer while playing dead. It's a good thing she now takes a pre-curtain potty break, mainly because we imagine it's a difficult process in that dress.


Betsy Wolfe Is a Cockney New Yorker
Betsy Wolfe may have played roles that have taken her to Ohio, England and Arendelle, but don't ask her to find NYC on a map. At the opening of Oh, Hello, we asked Wolfe to give us her best New York accent; what came out was what can only be described as the Artful Dodger with a strong belt. Not quite New York, Betsy, but we're totally dream casting you as Imogen Lloyd Webber in Broadway.com: The Musical.


We Wanna Party with Lin
On Lin-Manuel Miranda's SNL stint that virtually everyone in the United States watched, the Hamilton maestro took us back to our drama club days with a post-Crucible rager. Oh, if only Lin could retroactively be at all of our high school cast parties. A live performance would totally beat playing In the Heights and Hamilton on a boom box. Or Bluetooth. Whatever the kids are doing these days.


Sonja Morgan Wants to Sing About Class
We've had one Real Housewife play the keeper of the keys in Chicago, so let's get the ball rolling in another. Real Housewife of New York, off-Broadway star and international fashion lifestyle brand Sonja Morgan said she's had multiple people tell her recently that she'd make a great Mama Morton. You hear that, Weisslers? Now, Sonja, let's help you prepare. Step one: Stop calling her "Mama Whatever."


Maddie Baillio Can Be a Pocket Diva
Maddie Baillio's prepping to welcome us all to the '60s in Hairspray Live!, and she has a plethora of memorable co-stars with equally memorable voices, including Harvey Fierstein and Kristin Chenoweth. Baillio even has an impression of the latter, and it's uncanny. We know Maddie's busy with rehearsals, but if the pocket diva needs a standby for her Broadway return, we have some thoughts.


It's All Coming Back to Stephen Ashfield
No matter how hard Stephen Ashfield tries to turn it off, his love for Celine will go on—near, far, wherever he are is. The Book of Mormon confessed his love for the pop icon, despite it being a less popular opinion in his native U.K. He even flashed her signature chest pound. Don't be ashamed, Stephen. There's nothing wrong with loving a Canadian diva. Look at us and Ramin Karimloo.


Karaoke's Just an Audition at a Bar
Jenna Leigh Green is back on the musical theater stage in The Marvelous Wonderettes, and she didn't even have to sing at a karaoke bar this time. Green revealed that after her Sabrina the Teenage Witch days, the creators of Bare discovered her singing abilities while she belted it out at a bar, and the rest is history. Now, if only someone would recognize us as we sing "Let Me Be Your Star" at Duet...


We Have a Last-Minute Halloween Idea
Sorry, Lin, but we had to scrap our Hamilton Halloween costume at the eleventh hour after War Paint announced it was coming to Broadway. Check out Patti LuPone and Christine Ebersole in costume as makeup titans, including instantly iconic fascinators. We have two weeks to make this work. Miriam Shor, can you help us with the statement necklaces?