Scarlett Johansson Finds Her Inner Al Roker, Laura Osnes Likes Poop Jokes & More Lessons of the Week

You may have not won the Powerball jackpot, but another week has come and gone on Broadway and it's rich with lessons! From Scarlett Johansson to Kristin Chenoweth, the stars had a lot to teach us in the last seven days. 

Britney Spears Drives the Newsies Crazy
Corey Cott and the rest of the Newsies flew to L.A. last week to appear on ABC’s Dancing with the Stars. Cott was already jittery about making his very first television appearance as Jack Kelly, but all of the boys turned into fangirls when they found out pop icon and X Factor judge Britney Spears was in attendance. They tried to play it cool when they walked by the hitmaker, but soon found themselves lingering outside her dressing room. Hey boys, remember she’s not that innocent.

Matt Doyle’s Parents Are in for a Crude Awakening
Matt Doyle just joined the cast of The Book of Mormon as Elder Price, and he revealed to Broadway.com that his parents have not yet seen the often vulgar Tony-winning musical comedy. Doyle says his dad is a “pretty religious guy,” but he thinks his parents will be pleased with the show’s “beautiful message.” Um, beautiful message? Sure, but how would you like to have a talk with your parents about f**k frogs and giving the finger to God. Awkward!

Susan Boyle Wants to Rule the World 
Susan Boyle will not rest until she has conquered every medium. So the story of the support-hose-wearing YouTube sensation, which was already a stage musical, will next appear on the big screen. It's gonna be magic, right? So now that the musical I Dreamed A Dream, based on the life story of Boyle, is in the works, let's start dream casting. We're thinking it needs an incredibly beautiful Hollywood actress (who can sing!) pretending to be unattractive. We’re looking at you, Anne Hathaway.

Scarlett Johansson Dreams of Being a Weather Girl
Scarlett Johansson is more than just a pretty face, she's a flexible actress able to jump into any role—even weather girl. The Cat on a Hot Tin Roof bombshell fulfilled her lifelong “dream” and read the weather forecast live on Today after regular weatherman Al Roker came down with laryngitis. Using the flair of hand gestures and dramatic leg kick, Johansson breezed through her new gig. Maybe if all weather girls looked like ScarJo, we would never be caught without our galoshes.

Next Step for Rebecca Is Mime
James Barbour and Jill Paice—leads of the doomed Broadway musical Rebecca—have grand plans for how to resuscitate the aborted spectacle: Mime. The dynamic duo thinks the key to rescuing the elaborate tuner is to stage a very inexpensive and extremely off-Broadway production that’s all mime and absolutely no music. Sounds like a surefire hit to us! Actually, we can think of a few other musicals that might have had better success without any talking or singing, but we won't go there.
Alli Mauzey Needs to Join Alkalolics Anonymous
Glinda doesn’t gargle. That’s right, Wicked star Alli Mauzey takes her alkalol-ing very seriously, and goes straight to her trusty old neti pot when she’s gotta clear her head out. The Broadway belter has taken the first step and admitted that she’s “addicted” to the popular natural nasal wash. Mauzey keeps a bottle or two (we counted four…just saying) of Alkalol in her dressing room. But be careful, Alli, too much Alkalol and you might lose your balance in the bubble.

Broadway Waits for No One…Except Kristin Chenoweth
Steel Magnolias scribe Robert Harling confessed that finding “a slot in [Kristin] Chenoweth’s schedule” is pretty much the only thing keeping a musical adaptation of Soapdish from heading to the Great White Way. Our brains may actually explode trying to think of a more perfect role for the Broadway fave than soap diva Celeste Talbert (played by Sally Field in the hilarious movie)! We only got a taste of her pulling off big-haired, queen bitchiness in Harling’s GCB as Carlene Cockburn. Kristin, please clear your schedule already!

Laura Benanti is too Bootylicious for Broadway
Laura Benanti has already shown off her hot bod in the Playboy Club (and the magazine!), Gypsy and Women on the Verge, but the Go On star still doesn’t think you’re ready for this jelly. Benanti threw on a onesie and joined the Skivvies (Lauren Molina and Nick Cearley) for an undies-only concert and performed a mash-up of Destiny’s Child’s “Bootylicious” and Adina Howard’s “Freak Like Me.” We already know Broadway fans want Benanti to be a Bond girl, but no matter her next move, she keeps us shaken not stirred.

Lilla Crawford Says Yes to the Dress
Don’t worry, 11-year-old Annie star Lilla Crawford isn’t struggling with body image concerns and trying to overcome personal difficulty while on the hunt for the perfect wedding gown. She’s just gabbing about the first time she put on her character’s signature red dress. "Oh my gosh, this is the dress everyone knows Annie for, and I’m wearing it," the young star gushed. So glad the cute curlytop is happy, no one wants an Annie who's sadder than the 5,000 girls she beat out for the role.

Laura Osnes Made a Music Video About Sharting
Laura Osnes is one of Broadway’s classiest ingénues, but even the basest toilet humor can get a few chuckles out of the Cinderella star. She told us she’s a huge fan of Kathleen Monteleone’s parody of Sara Bareilles' "Uncharted," elegantly entitled "I Sharted." The Tony nominee even got a bunch of her friends together and made a music video for the craptastic tune. Let’s recap: Laura Osnes, sweet, innocent, apple-cheeked Laura Osnes, likes gross-out humor. The stars really are just like us!