Sutton Foster Sells Books with Boobs, Matthew Morrison is Funking Crazy & More Lessons of the Week

From countless live-action remakes to Full Fuller House, it's been a very wacky week, and it was no different on the Great White Way. Butts vibrated, Hedwig crossed the Delaware and then some. Don't worry; we went through it all and have you covered. So sit back, throw on your Smash Spotify playlist and enjoy the Lessons of the Week!

Elisabeth Moss Wants to Be Your Star
Mad Men star Elisabeth Moss is back on Broadway, and as it turns out, she's just as excited as we are. The Heidi Chronicles star revealed that though she’s currently in a play, she’s a huge musical theater nerd. Upon learning that Patti LuPone once sat in the same Show People chair, Moss sniffs the furniture (normal). She’s also obsessed with Smash and wants to send Megan Hilty fan mail. Good luck getting a ticket to that Bombshell concert, though!

Sutton Foster Has a Busty Marketing Strategy
Between all that talk about lady gardens, mouthgasms and Lena Dunham’s ass cheeks, the Younger series premiere was crazy! But we, along with Sutton Foster’s character Liza, learned some very important lessons about life as a millennial. Like, the best way to sell a Joyce Carol Oates novel is to encourage women to tweet topless selfies. Your move, Julie Andrews.

Boggess & Burtka Buzz Their Butts
We’re switching from boobs to butts. Over at It Shoulda Been You, newlyweds-to-be Sierra Boggess and David Burtka are all about maintaining a healthy lifestyle. The secret? Their "exclusive" gym at the Brooks Atkinson, where they vibrate their backsides. So try it out, keep at it, and remember: Your butt is enough; your butt is so enough; it’s unbelievable how enough your butt is. Finally, a way to work off all those peanut butter cups!

Hedwig Has Colonial Roots
We all know Hedwig’s iconic feathered do that the internationally ignored song stylist rocks at the top of her show, but were you aware that its look goes well past the days of Charlie’s Angels and all the way back to the Revolution? Hedwig wig and makeup designer Mike Potter describes the look as “George Washington meets Farrah Fawcett.” Hey, we've got a great idea for Hedwig's next project...

Harvey Fierstein Makes Funky Monkeys Fresh
Everybody rejoice, because Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tinman and Lion are officially easing on down the road to NBC this December (and we still need a Dorothy—help us!) Broadway icon Harvey Fierstein will give the book a revamp, so if Dorothy’s silver shoes are actually red boots, don’t act surprised.

Julia Murney’s Legs Defy Gravity
Anything you can do, Julia Murney can do better. She can belt higher. She can bake a tastier chocolate cake. She can do a better porn voice. And she can extend her leg like no other. Seriously: Nobody in all of Oz—no wizard that there is or was—will ever bring those gams down. Now, can your legs hit a high F while suspended in mid-air?

Helen Mirren Will Toss You In Subway Jail
Helen Mirren—judging by photographic evidence—is every bit as regal on the R train as she is on Broadway in The Audience. But apparently, the Dame’s altruism is merely an act. This week, Mirren admitted to accidentally getting someone kicked off the train by police, and is unsure of his fate. That's no excuse, Mirren. We know all about royal pardons (she's a real queen, right?).

Rob McClure Gives Insane Lane
Move over, Christina Bianco. On the latest Side by Side with Susan Blackwell, the Honeymoon in Vegas star prank calls Norm Lewis as Nathan Lane, and it’s uncanny. Too uncanny. During McClure’s I’m Not Rappaport days, he did his Nathan impression at Angus McIndoe, not knowing that the Tony winner was behind him the whole time. Honeymoon is closing on April 5, but something tells us he'd be a great James Wicker. Or Pumbaa. Or that chef in Mousehunt.

There’s a James Snyder Museum in California
In the for-sure-final-definitely-no-more-until-maybe-a-Christmas-special-but-we’ll-see last episode of Hey Kid (cue buckets of tears), James Snyder takes us to his childhood bedroom in California, which has since been transformed into a Synder shrine. The exhibit even includes a Polish poster for She’s the Man. We have a feeling it’s not the only James Snyder museum out there. We definitely don’t have one in our closet at Broadway.com HQ. Yep, no creepy shrines here…

Matthew Morrison is, Simply…Funk
You thought the monkeys in The Wiz were funky? You haven’t seen the moves on Matty Fresh. Back in his college days, the Finding Neverland star took part in a dance instructional video by the name of Simply Funk. He even made the cover of the VHS. We will provide 1,000 peanut butter cups to whomever can supply us with a copy of said VHS. (On an unrelated note, please send all peanut butter cup donations to 729 7th Avenue, New York, NY. Please.)