Jonathan Groff Forgot About the Boy, Laura Benanti Doesn’t Need a Speechwriter & More Lessons of the Week

Happy Friday, and happy Kristin Chenoweth’s birthday weekend! Whether you’re celebrating by giving your green friend a makeover, shouting that you’re a vice principal or singing “Hopelessly Devoted to You” in an nearly-empty diner, put your party plans on hold and study up with the Lessons of the Week. A lot went down on the Great White Way over the past seven days, so take it all in below!


Groff Is Becoming One with Sutton
Is it possible to transfer your talents via saliva? First, Jonathan Groff was a Sutton super fan, then she licked him. Next, he upped the ante by tapping through “Anything Goes.” And last week, he performed “Forget About the Boy”—Millie wig and all—at City Center. What’s next, Groff? Selling your panties? Making out with Matthew Morrison? If you need a Sutton to-do list, we've got you covered.


Laura Benanti Has a Speech Prepared
She's finished singing about vanilla ice cream, so the next logical step is...hitting the campaign trail? Laura Benanti, after teasing her likeness to Melania Trump with Stephen Colbert back in March, returned to The Late Show to send up the potential First Lady and her "93% original" RNC speech. We shudder at the thought of Trump: The Musical, but at least we have a head start on dream casting.


Death Becomes Alice & Emily
We’re used to seeing them as conjoined twins, but something tells us violent showbiz rivals wouldn’t be too far off for Alice Ripley and Emily Skinner to play. The Side Show and cabaret duo revealed that they would love to headline a musical adaptation of Death Becomes Her, taking on camp classic roles created by Meryl Streep and Goldie Hawn. We’re holding our breath until this happens.


Bianca Marroquin Wants to Twinkle 
Bianca Marroquin is teaching her bestie Jaime Camil about Broadway life as they star in Chicago, and in turn, his daughter Elena is teaching her about footwear. The Roxie Hart actress kept gushing over Elena’s light-up shoes, which led to her coining the nickname “Twinkle Toes.” We’re just saying: We’d be into a “Hot Honey Rag” with illuminated high-tops.


Broadway's Back on TV (No, Not Smash)
Fade in on three brothers, with a hunger for theater real estate. If you miss Smash and need more Broadway drama on the small screen, listen up. The story of the Shuberts is getting a miniseries based on Michael Riedel's Razzle Dazzle: The Battle for Broadway. We'll see all the drama (the laughter, the tears just like pearls) unfold—hopefully with fewer Bollywood numbers.


Ingrid Michaelson Needs a B'way Guide 
After collaborating with cast members from Deaf West's Spring Awakening and catching her boyfriend Will Chase in Something Rotten!, Ingrid Michaelson has been bitten by the Broadway bug. The singer-songwriter tweeted about wanting to write a musical but needs to know how to begin. We’re sure your bf has an idea, Ingrid—he was on Smash.


Judy Kaye Wants to Suck at Singing (Again)
Meryl Streep is giving Florence Foster Jenkins the big screen treatment, but if given the opportunity, Judy Kaye would drop everything and tell her story on the Great White Way again. The Wicked star already played the tragically shrill opera diva on stage in Souvenir, and she's ready to revive the act. She says she even has the costumes ready to go, so all we need is a producer. Or a Kickstarter.


Diana Ross Goes for Whitney Houston
She may be serving Diana Ross on stage, but at karaoke, Allison Semmes is all about Whitney. The Motown star revealed that her go-to song is "I Wanna Dance With Somebody." Allison, we know you don't think of yourself as a diva, but please let us know when you're free for a divas' night out. You can sing Diana in the show, Whitney at Duet and Donna in the cab back home. #DivasNightOut


McCarrell Trades Frappes for Pokémon
Do you want to be the very best—like no one ever was? If to catch them is your real test, buy Frappuccinos. At least, that’s what Chris McCarrell does. The Les Miserables favorite shared that he bribes his young castmates with Starbucks to get them to play Pokémon Go from his phone while he’s on stage. It’s a shame he can’t bring his phone on stage; we have a feeling that barricade is filled with Rattatas.


Jellicles Are Not for the Faint of Heart
They may be Jellicles, but that doesn’t mean they’re not terrifying. Andy Blankenbuehler’s kids attended the first preview of Cats and had to shield their eyes from all those felines. We don’t know what upset the wee Blankenbuehlers: adult humans parading around in elaborate cat costumes and makeup is completely normal. What's freaky about a Jellicle ball in a junkyard, children?