Editor's Journal: At Sea with Rosie O'Donnell and R Family Vacations
After bringing you his adventures at sea on last year's inaugural R Family Vacations cruise to the Caribbean, Broadway.com Editor-in-Chief Paul Wontorek was back on board this summer, sailing to New England, Nova Scotia and beyond with a boatful of joyful vacationing gay and lesbian families, not to mention a bevy of Broadway stars. He documented his adventures for Broadway.com readers in the following online diary of his trip, day by day.
Monday, July 11
10:52am
At Sea
Two decks above my cozy room aboard the Norwegian Dawn, Avenue Q star John Tartaglia is teaching kid cruisers some of the tricks of his trade with an early morning puppet workshop, I promised John at last night's dance party up in the Spinnaker Lounge that I'd try to make the class, but predictably, I overslept.
The daily schedule of events for the R Family Vacations cruise, documented in a leaflet called the Freestyle Daily, is daunting to say the least. At this very moment, I could be learning "a little Fosse" with Jill Powell's "Getting Proud Dance Experience" in the Fitness Center, participating in a multi-racial families workshop up in the Dazzles Lounge, taking a ship tour with the cruise 
director's staff, learning about marketing to the gay community with PR guy John Butler in the Cinema or finding out how to "style your hair in half the time" with a "Bad Hair Days Seminar" at the Java Cafe. Instead, I'm here on an open-air balcony looking out on a vast sea, writing to you.
The mammoth and gorgeous Norwegian Dawn, part of the Norwegian Cruise Line, pulled out of New York harbor a little after 6pm yesterday, as Taboo star Brooke Elliott now in the national tour of Wicked belted out "New York, New York" poolside for a large crowd of bathing suit-clad gay and lesbian moms and dads and their cannon-balling young ones. Many of the faces at the Sailaway BBQ were familiar from last year's cruise, but the crowd seemed bigger than ever.
After finding dinner in one of the ship's 10 ! restaurants, cruisers filled up the 1,100-seat Stardust Theater at 9pm, where lovable R Family leaders Gregg Kaminsky and Kelli O'Donnell received a standing ovation when they took to the stage. After the prerequisite anti-George Bush comment, they announced to the pumped-up crowd that they've upped the ante 
for nightly raffles this year and that by week's end, one onboard family will win a car! That Oprah-esque big moment will come later, but I would have been just as excited to win one of last night's offerings: a 10-person steak dinner, a spa treatment and Biotherm gift bags. Gregg and Kelli then introduced the R Family staff, who oozed cuteness—and received the cruise's second standing ovation—by dancing out from behind a curtain in matching pink and white-checkered shirts to the beat of Sister Sledge's "We Are Family" Get it?
The main entertainment attraction last night was The Kinsey Sicks, those self-described "chicks with schtick" that played off-Broadway a few seasons back with Dragapella upstairs at Studio 54. The R Family crowd ate up the drag quartet's a capella harmonies and song satires, which took on cruise-appropriate themes like the temptations of a food buffet adding newfangled lyrics to "Don't Rain on My Parade" and gulp the Titanic... or at least its Oscar-winning theme song and chest-pounding songstress Celine Dion. I couldn't believe that The Kinsey Sicks 
were still making fun of Celine so many years after "My Heart Will Go On" has left the airwaves, but the spoof still got plenty of laughs. After the bows, the gals announced plans to present I Wanna Be a Republican on Friday night at 11pm, warning that cruisers should find alternate plans for the kids as it contains "mature thematic elements." Sounds edgy!
Time to get moving here. Today promises Mortification Theater with Seth Rudetsky and Jack Plotnick, Gavin Creel and Robbie Roth in the Spinnaker of Creel, the Freestyle Daily adorably notes, "American Idol has nothing on this guy!" and the main event, the all-star Rosie's Variety Hour.
Okay, I'm off to work on my sunburn!
I set foot on Canadian soil today for the first time in my life and immediately left my Sony Ericsson camera phone the fancy model we gave out to Tony nominees on the big night in the back of a taxi. But thanks to Broadway.com photographer Bruce Glikas—who actually thought to get a receipt for the ride—and some friendly Canadian gals in a local jewelry shop, I was on the phone with my taxi driver within minutes and the phone was returned to the Norwegian Dawn. Now, as the boat prepares to leave port and head back to the U.S., I leave with warm and cheery memories of our friends up north.
Although an overcast day, R Family cruisers were spotted shopping and sightseeing all over Halifax. A handful of couples even took
At last night's big show at the Stardust, host Rosie O'Donnell zeroed in on me from the stage, stopped the show and wondered aloud why I was scribbling notes on her hilarious monologue. Although there were a few tense moments as she gave me the once over, she relaxed after learning that I was from Broadway.com and not the tabloids. "Then you're okay," she said. "I love Broadway.com." But of course!
What I was writing down were some of Rosie's digs at that suddenly-scary
Scientologist Tom Cruise, who she chided for picking a fight with Brooke Shields who, of course, succeeded Rosie in Grease! on Broadway. I'd love to tell you exactly what she said, but let's just leave it as a "you had to be there" moment. Book your room for next summer's Alaskan cruise and see for yourself how fun and free Rosie is at sea!
Also on the bill yesterday was a solo show by recent La Cage aux Folles star Gavin Creel in the Spinnaker Lounge. Accompanied by Robbie Roth, his songwriting partner of a little over a year, Creel won over fans old and new with a radio-ready set of folky pop songs. Although most of the tunes were new,
Okay, the boat is moving now and the good people of Halifax are lined-up along the shore waving as we pass. I'm gonna go out on my balcony and enjoy the beauty of it all.
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
I'm writing from the Internet Café on the 9th deck of the Norwegian Dawn. Attending to business on an Apple laptop at the next station is pop icon Cyndi Lauper, who will no doubt fill the Stardust Theatre to the rafters this evening with two concerts that have the ship abuzz with anticipation. Although the ship is docked in Boston Harbor, I chose to stay onboard and take advantage of the Mandara Spa and the empty ship. Apparantly Cyndi was on the same page!
A surprise celeb cruiser this year is lesbian rocker Melissa Etheridge, who is onboard with wife Tammy Lynn Michaels. As I'm a huge fan of Etheridge, I'm praying for a sneak musical performance, but it's also totally okay if she just wants to take it easy as I always have my Etheridge MP3s on my iPod to fall back on.
All of the R Family Broadway stars were in the Stardust last night for stage fave Darius de Haas' 11pm concert, Wonder. A musical celebration of the songs of Stevie Wonder, the hour-long set found De Haas backed by sister Aisha de Haas and her Caroline, or Change co-star Capathia Jenkins and an amazing four-piece band that
"Welcome to my living room on the sea," de Haas said before launching into one amazing Wonder song after the next—timeless classics like "Ribbon in the Sky," "Signed, Sealed, Delivered," "Tell Me Something Good and "You Are the Sunshine of My Life." Particularly touching moments arrived when Darius sang "Isn't She Lovely?" to visibly moved big sister Aisha who made him green with envy when she received Wonder's Songs in the Key of Life one long-past Christmas and not him and "If It's Magic," which de Haas dedicated to the late Luther Vandross. De Haas commented that he saw Vandross perform many times and was always in awe of his professionalism, commitment and "soul-inspiring" presence. The same could be said about de Haas and the wonderful Wonder.
Cutest moment of this trip so far by far: The nine-year-old son of a new friend singing "If You Were Gay" from Avenue Q to a table full of his dad's friends including another new friend, Charles Hart, who is not the same guy who wrote The Phantom of the Opera and dated Jane Krakowski!. To hear a perfectly-adjusted young performer-to-be sing lyrics like "If you were queer/I'd still be here" encapsulated everything that's right about the world of R Family Vacations.
Another unforgettable moment came today at lunch at Pepe's in Provincetown, when yet another new friend, Jason Shelley, put me on the phone to say hi to his mom: Paula Wayne! Yes, that Paula Wayne, who played Lorna Moon in the original 1964 Broadway cast of Golden Boy opposite Sammy Davis, Jr. Wayne now calls sunny South Florida home and adorably
Although our night at sea between Boston and Provincetown was light on performances by theater stars, what we did have for entertainment was unbeatable: the awe-inspiring Cyndi Lauper. R Family vacationers filled the Stardust Theatre to the brim for both of Lauper's concerts, which found the fit and fabulous pop diva crooning out all of her big hits with flawlessly and with great spirit. As is now customary, she dedicated a rich rendition of "True Colors" to her lesbian sister, leaving most of the audience wet-eyed. After rumored debuts in projects like Wonderful Town, Sweeney Todd and Rosie O'Donnell's own Find Me, I like to think that Lauper will find her way to the Broadway stage sooner rather than later. Any ideas?
Friday, July 15, 2005
Another resort beach town, another report of top-notch talent of the Broadway variety…
Liz Callaway was up first last night in the Spinnaker. The clear-voiced diva, who is traveling with grown son Nicholas, performed a sixties-themed set inspired by her CD, The Beat Goes On, under the musical direction of Steve Marzullo. After getting the crowd swaying and singing with songs like "Leaving on a Jet Plane," "Up, Up and Away"
After the extended set, the crowd sprinted down five decks to fight for seats to see Avenue Q Tony nominee John Tartaglia perform AD-LIBerty, his popular act which premiered at Joe's Pub last year. Without a puppet in sight to the disappointment of some of the younger ones in the crowd, Tartaglia showed off his versatility as a song-and-dance man with the show, which included pop hits like George Michael's "Freedom," Deborah Gibson's "Only in My Dreams" and The Village People's "YMCA" and a funny take on "What I Did for Love" from A Chorus Line that found Tartaglia showing off his talent for character voices by singing
Rosie O'Donnell took to the stage next to pull a raffle winner for the week's big prize—a one-year lease of a Volvo, which quickly became a two-year lease after O'Donnell pressured the car company's spokesperson to double the prize. Volvo, a huge supporter of the Human Rights Campaign and gay and lesbian issues in general, gave the lease to a lucky lesbian in the crowd who, ironically, already had a Volvo! The more touching moment came when a two-mommies family who won their cruise from Volvo came onto the stage to meet O'Donnell. A heartwarming moment came when Rosie interviewed one of the two teenage daughters, adopted from the foster child system, and the girl told the crowd that her former foster parents abandoned her when she told them she was gay. Choked up, O'Donnell told the girl that she just won her entire family a lifetime passage on R Family Vacations excursions to the cheers of the crowd. Not a dry eye to be found.
Saturday, July 16, 2005
I finally spotted Melissa Etheridge and wife Tammy Lynn Michaels in the crowd at Orfeh's show at the Spinnaker, where they sat with Rosie and Kelli O'Donnell. Orfeh, who Rosie told the R Family crowd was robbed of a Tony nomination for Saturday Night Fever on Monday night I tend to agree, made good use of her celebrity audience members. While performing the soul classic "If I Was Your Woman," she stepped right into the audience to sing a verse to Rosie, who also saw some of "If I Can't Have You" Orfeh's showstopper from Fever directed her way. Looking fab in jeans and a multi-color top featuring images of Donatella Versace !, Orfeh also performed Janis' "Piece of My Heart" and Britney's "Hit Me Baby One More Time" in addition to some of her own songs. Before crooning "You Don't Know," a rare track from her days as a pop recording artist,
Later in the night at Gatsby's Lounge, I cheered on big belter Kate Pazakis and piano maestro Brian J. Nash, regulars at the Duplex in the Village. The duo was incredibly cooperative, performing "Defying Gravity" from Wicked two-and-a-half times at my request! Also good on command was Anika Larsen, who came in to the bar looking like Eva Peron sporting a red glitter tiara on her pulled-back blonde locks. Pointing to the balcony that surrounds the two-leveled piano bar, I told Larsen that she should sing "Don't Cry for Me Argentina" from up above. Amazingly, she nodded, got up and did it for me—flawlessly! God, I love this cruise.
Back on land and back to normal—suitcase unpacked, dog home from the kennel—and ready to report about my final day aboard the Norwegian Dawn.
The ship drifted all day in a cloud of fog someone in the Long Island Shore killing any chances of a last minute sun tan. Everybody on board knew that it didn't take the scheduled 36 hours to get from Martha's Vineyard back to Manhattan, but who was complaining? I could have spent another week enjoying the good people, free food and unbeatable entertainment that make up an R Family vacation.
First up was Orfeh in a sexy black sequin dress, who led the 15-member cast singing "Age of Aquarius." The song was one of several featuring the arrangements that Rudetsky created for last year's Actors' Fund of America concert presentation of Hair. Also on the bill was "Going Down" performed by concert star Gavin Creel, "Let the Sunshine In" by the company and a gay take on "White Boys"/"Black Boys" with Darius de Haas effortlessly taking all three of the latter songs parts. Ledisi, who sang "Black Boys" in the Actors' Fund concert, wowed the crowd with "You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woman" at the second performance, they demanded an encore from the soul sister. Rent alumni Aisha de Haas and Anika Larsen sounded great on "Take Me or Leave Me" from the hit show. A svelte Liz McCartney offered up David Friedman's "My Simple Wish Rich, Famous and Powerful" and if that all weren't enough, the other Liz—Callaway—belted out "The Story Goes On" from Baby in the original key!
After the show, Rosie came out to say farewell and introduce a slide show that she put together featuring images from the week's trip. Passengers cheered as they saw photos of themselves, their families and friends. Underscoring the movie was soft acoustic guitar that, once the screen was lifted, was revealed to actually be a live performance by the one and only Etheridge. As expected, chaos ensued in the crowd as passengers roared—and pulled out their camera phones to document the unexpected highlight of the trip. Last seen bald and beautiful on the Grammys, at which point her struggle with breast cancer was revealed, Etheridge sported a short cropped blonde 'do and looked well-rested. She told the fan-filled audience that she'd been travelling cross-country with wife Tammy Lynn Michaels in an RV and,
R Family Vacations has announced plans for three trips in 2006—an Alaskan cruise departing from Seattle over July 4th weekend on the Norwegian Star, a sister ship to the Norwegian Dawn, a Galapagos Island cruise and an on-land vacation at a resort in Minnesota. After two amazing weeks with the R Family family, it's hard to not want to follow them anywhere they go. More than a top of the line entertainment festival, the R Family experience is essentially a human one. Sure everyone's got politics on their minds, but things like love, friendship and family on this soul-changing journey.
Will I see you onboard next year? Visit the R Family website and find out how to join the extended family.
Thanks for reading.
3:42pm
Halifax, Nova Scotia
advantage of the Canadian locale by getting married, including Derek and Norman, a Manhattan couple that I met last night in the Spinnaker. They even invited me to the 12:30pm service today and, although I do love to cry at weddings, I couldn't figure out where the heck the chapel of love was located! But fear not—I'll toast the happy couple later in the day, and will be sure to send your best wishes, too.
Rosie's Variety Hour opened with a big production number featuring a kick-line of chorus boys and girls in old New England garb costumes by Tony nominated Taboo designer Bobby Pearce with Rosie in the middle, doing her now-signature "I sort of know the choreography and lyrics" routine, which always reminds me of those great I Love Lucy moments in which Lucy Ricardo would try to insert herself into a big number down at Ricky's nightclub. The rest of the variety show featured many of the talented performers that R Family Vacations invited on board for this year's cruise. John Tartaglia, who will perform his show AD-LIBerty later in the week, was up first, singing "If You Were Gay" from Avenue Q with former co-stars Leo Daignault and Jennifer Barnhart and oversized puppet replicas of the Broadway Rod and Nicky. The ever-charming Esera Tuaolo, the former NFL player who shared his moving coming out story on last year's cruise, was up next with a gay take on "I Know Where I've Been" from Hairspray. Also on the ship for a second year is a floating production of Free to Be…You and Me, which was represented by a performance of the title song by the cast including Tartaglia and Daignault. Musical director Seth Rudetsky then offered a peek at his adorably obsessive comedy, which involved an in-depth critique of the vocal prowess and odd phrasing of one Barbra Joan Streisand. First-time cruiser Orfeh closed the show, reviving the disco chestnut "Nights on Broadway" from her Broadway triumph in Saturday Night Fever Anika Larsen took the other part in the rocking duet.
Creel also offered a stirring version of Joni Mitchell's "A Case of You," from her legendary Blue album. "A desert island, some mashed potatoes and Blue and I'm all set," Creel joked. Speaking of colors, the original song "Green to Gray" was nothing short of gorgeous, as was "These Four Walls" and "Light Up," which Creel was inspired to write after witnessing the protests in Nassau, Bahamas, that put a slight damper on last year's R Family cruise and almost got me killed, but that's another story!. But Creel's music is not all moody and introspective—"Friday, Saturday and Sunday," a disco ode to his coming-of-age Manhattan party days, was a blast. Creel and Roth are headed up to Toronto at the end of the month to put these songs to wax so be patient if he's not back in the Broadway woods in the near future. Also make sure to get the CD when it's done.
6:06pm
Boston, Massachusetts
Lauper is just one of Rosie O'Donnell's celebrity friends that have set sail with this year's cruise. Also on hand is Cagney and Lacey icon Sharon Gless, who took part in a screening and Q&A with O'Donnell, her Queer as Folk co-star, in the Stardust yesterday afternoon, and Mario Cantone, who will host a screening of his Laugh Whore Showtime special in the Cinema on Saturday. Speaking of laugh whores, out and proud comedians Judy Gold, Poppy Champlain and Jason Dudey yes, it's pronounced that way had the boat in stitches at last night's Comedy Showcase.
normally plays for Vanessa Williams De Haas has been touring with the recording and stage diva in recent months.
7:23pm
Provincetown, Massachusetts
listened to me gush on the phone that Golden Boy is one of my all-time favorite original cast recordings. She even told me to call her the next time I'm in Miami so we can meet for lunch. Can you imagine?
2:21pm
Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts
and "Downtown" at which point Callaway asked the crowd—her "Liz-beans"—to do back-up for her, Rosie O'Donnell came to the stage to ask Callaway to stall while the ship's crew carried an injured passenger out of the bar in a wheelchair. A pro, Callaway launched into a few extra songs and even took a request from the crowd—"Meadowlark," which required the help of audience member Seth Rudetsky on piano. Funnily, musical theater guru Rudetsky didn't really know the song but pulled it off beautifully anyway. I wrongly thought every piano player knew the Stephen Schwartz standard by heart.
as animated characters like Miss Piggy, Elmo, Gonzo, Cartman…and Carol Channing! The high-energy show, aided greatly by a killer band led by Mark Hartman and a kicky ensemble of triple threats, could make the charming Tartaglia a star in a place like Las Vegas. Actually, that'll happen anyway when he reprises his role in the strip production of Q later this summer.
12:52pm
At Sea
This is it—the last day on the Norwegian Dawn with R Family. I'm going to enjoy this ship to its fullest today, but first wanted to tell you about last night.
she explained that she wrote it as a lovelorn teen. "I love you dearly, but you ruined my songwriting career," the happily married singer hilariously said to hubby Andy Karl, on vacation from Altar Boyz for the cruise.
1:17pm
New York, New York
"Unbeatable" clearly isn't a strong enough word to describe Saturday night's line-up in the Stardust Theatre, which culminated in two surprise acoustic sets by out rocker Melissa Etheridge. But first things first. The scheduled powerhouse show of the night was Seth Rudetsky's Broadway Belters, a concert showing off the A-list onboard talent, many of whom had been performing in various venues on the ship all week. 
although she'd only planned on relaxing on the cruise, couldn't resist getting up and performing. Etheridge sang a flurry of tunes including a good number of her hits—"Come to My Window," "Bring Me Some Water," "You Can Sleep While I Drive"—and Rosie's favorite of her songs, "Enough of Me." She then ended the muscular set with Janis Joplin's "Piece of My Heart," sending the R Family vacationers out into the ship on a high for a final night of gambling, drinking, packing and teary goodbyes.
Paul Wontorek
Editor-in-Chief
Broadway.com